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rain at last
Apr. 14th, 2002 01:08 amPast two night have been weird and enlightening. Went to Dinner with Mr Bill Sir Friday night. Great Italian food. The pesto was not completely blended - whole pine nuts and everything. They used it in lasagna instead of tomatoes sauce. It was GOOD but a little too rich to finish. Then Magnolia Bakery for dessert - banana pudding! I'd love to open a place like that! It was great to spend some time with Bill. I haven't seen him in months. He's such a great guy. We're going to the Russian Baths tomorrow. I've never been before and am getting my first professional massage! I'm excited.
After dessert we went to the Dug Out (it's a bear even weekend in NYC. NO ONE hit on me except people I've dated. How weird is that? Joe was there. I feel bad for him. He's single again. I don't want to go out with him. I know that but Seeing him makes me sad - I want to hug him and tell him it will be OK.
I know that we want different things (monogamy is a big one) and that I can't "fix" him. I saw him again tonight at TY's (went in to meet Mike for drinks). He asked me out twice tonight.
Last night I said I wanted a baby. He said he'd try with me (EVERYONE says that. weird responder to be so uniform). Then he said he'd be a good Dad because he's a good provider. His family would want for nothing. Then gave me a look and wandered off. THAT'S one of the big reasons I won't go back out with him. I HATE being treated like that. Like a woman in the 50s. Do I LOOK like I need to be looked after? Like I want for anything now?
Tonight he vacillated between flirting with me and his other ex Doug and some random guys. He's all over the place. The weird part is this would have bothered me but I wouldn't have felt right voicing it before. Greg is the best person I've ever dated regularly. In comparison, I realize how little I've settled for before. I deserve to be treated like a person, an equal. Joe can't do that.
On the way home I bought myself a Gerber daisy (a red-pink one) and a butterscotch mini cheesecake from Magnolia. It was good but WAY rich. I forced my self to eat half before I chucked it. Their cheesecake is like that. but it's GOOD.
It's finally raining . We really need it. I love the sound of rain and the way it smells. The tulips I put in last fall came up (yellow and red). and some hyacinths. the daffodils and tulips from last year didn't. One of the mini irises just opened. I love gardening. It makes me feel grounded. I'm going to miss this little patch of dirt when I move. Hopefully, I'll find a place with a little backyard that gets sun.
Well, I better hit the hay.
After dessert we went to the Dug Out (it's a bear even weekend in NYC. NO ONE hit on me except people I've dated. How weird is that? Joe was there. I feel bad for him. He's single again. I don't want to go out with him. I know that but Seeing him makes me sad - I want to hug him and tell him it will be OK.
I know that we want different things (monogamy is a big one) and that I can't "fix" him. I saw him again tonight at TY's (went in to meet Mike for drinks). He asked me out twice tonight.
Last night I said I wanted a baby. He said he'd try with me (EVERYONE says that. weird responder to be so uniform). Then he said he'd be a good Dad because he's a good provider. His family would want for nothing. Then gave me a look and wandered off. THAT'S one of the big reasons I won't go back out with him. I HATE being treated like that. Like a woman in the 50s. Do I LOOK like I need to be looked after? Like I want for anything now?
Tonight he vacillated between flirting with me and his other ex Doug and some random guys. He's all over the place. The weird part is this would have bothered me but I wouldn't have felt right voicing it before. Greg is the best person I've ever dated regularly. In comparison, I realize how little I've settled for before. I deserve to be treated like a person, an equal. Joe can't do that.
On the way home I bought myself a Gerber daisy (a red-pink one) and a butterscotch mini cheesecake from Magnolia. It was good but WAY rich. I forced my self to eat half before I chucked it. Their cheesecake is like that.
It's finally raining . We really need it. I love the sound of rain and the way it smells. The tulips I put in last fall came up (yellow and red). and some hyacinths. the daffodils and tulips from last year didn't. One of the mini irises just opened. I love gardening. It makes me feel grounded. I'm going to miss this little patch of dirt when I move. Hopefully, I'll find a place with a little backyard that gets sun.
Well, I better hit the hay.
