Running in Place

[guywithmonsters]

You know how you run into people you haven't seen in a long time or even a friend you just haven't spoken to in a while and they're in the same place they were before? Different drama, but the same weird place emotionally and just in life in general?

That makes me sad. While I am no where near the best person I could be, I do see myself progressing and evolving. I get stuck and then get unstuck. I'll get stuck again, but it's usually a little further up the road.

It's hard for me lately to be kind to people who have been stuck for a long time. I don't have patience for their drama or empathy for their complaints. It would be nice if that wasn't the truth but it is.

Am I getting harder or just not suffering fools as gladly? Maybe I just need some distance. Some time to get a little further in m y journey so their inability or refusal to move on won't feel like it's holding me back.

Yeah, I think I just need to fly some more before I spend time with the less buoyant types.

OK, back to work.

Things I Am Grateful For
Having enough
The discontent that enables me to keep moving when I want to give up
People who love and encourage me
My life - it's pretty sweet
Mr Bear - he's very sweet and silly
Finding those little wood boxes (it saves me some not fun carpentry)
Fresh roses from the yard

Things I Want Today
Irises in the yard
Peonies too
A little more breathig room financially (this car payment is binding)
Raspberry sorbet
A massage

Comments

[muruch.livejournal.com]

Yes! I know exactly what you mean. I used to think that all people changed constantly, but sadly some never change. While I think the core of my personality is always there, I am constantly changing in every way. Both who I am inside and what's going on in my life. I'm not even the same person I was yesterday, let alone years ago.And yeah, I'm losing patience with the sticks in the mud, too. I think it's frustrating not only because they haven't changed, but a lot of times they don't want us to change either. And I don't care for being reminded of past versions of me, especially if the current version of me is being rejected. It does feel like being held back.

[goreyboy.livejournal.com]

That's it exactly. I'm almost Ok with them staying put so long as they don't need me to as well.

I read somewhere that your core "person" is like the root and trunk of a tree - the rest of your life is growing branches and flowers off that trunk while expanding the roots so it's stable.